


Something Special

by Saturn_the_Almighty



Series: Cobalt and Cerulean [2]
Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: ADHD Caboose, All my headcanons wrapped into one fic, Asexual Caboose, Blue Team, Caboose POV, Caboose POV-ish, Caboose is precious, Caboose's Sisters, Church POV, Coming Out, Crying, Differing POV, Face Reveal, Gen, Gender Dysphoria, Grif is also mentioned, Helmet Hair, I am physically incapable of writing anything without mentioning a Red™, I really love these helmet reveal fics don't I?, Kinda, Mild Language, Platonic Cuddling, Sappy Love Songs, Singing, Soft Church, Trans Caboose, Tucker is mentioned, he's in it for like a second, platonic fluff, set around s1
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-07
Updated: 2018-06-07
Packaged: 2019-05-17 00:30:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14821817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saturn_the_Almighty/pseuds/Saturn_the_Almighty
Summary: Michael J. Caboose is something special.





	Something Special

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote the first half of this months ago... And the rest a few days ago so that's weird.

Caboose loved his new base. It was really cool. There were blue lights everywhere, like the lava lamp his sister Miya had. It was made of metal like his old house on the moon. He could go up to the roof and yell at the other people across blood valley. He could yell at his new best friend Church. Church was the best thing about his new base. He was cooler than the blue lights. He could yell louder than all of them. He was in charge because he was the coolest (no matter what Tucker said) and he was the best friend anyone could ask for.

Caboose had promised to call his sisters as soon as he landed. He had forgotten about that. Now, it was almost a week since and he still hadn't called them. But he would. As soon as he could get Church to take off his helmet. It was only going to take a moment. "Church, come on. I'm doing it. It's fine, see?" Caboose fumbled with the clasps on his helmet for a second before pulling it off and holding it out to show Church. Taking off his helmet wouldn't hurt. After all, they were in the safety of the base and Caboose really wanted to see what Church looked like. He imagined Church had a pointy nose like his sister Petra.

Church pushed Caboose's helmet away. "No. I'm not going to take off my helmet, Caboose," He said. Caboose fluffed up his shoulder length chestnut curls, unfurling them from their helmet-hair state. He looked at Church with his greenish- brown eyes and frowned. "Why not? I want to see what you look like." Caboose put his helmet down on the floor and sat cross-legged on the cool concrete next to it. Church didn't sit down. He didn't like to. He always stayed standing up with his arms crossed.

"Do you have brown hair?" Caboose asked. Church tipped his head back and huffed out a breath. It came out crackly through the helmet mic. "No," he answered simply. Caboose didn't seem phased. "Do you have black hair?" he tried. Yeah, maybe Church had black hair like his sister Trinity. Church was silent. Caboose could hear him draw a breath. "No," he said. It sounded like a question, not an answer. Caboose knew the difference between those.

Caboose slowly tilted his head to one side, narrowing his eyes slightly. "Are you sure?" he asked, drawing out the R sound. Church uncrossed his arms and clasped them in front of him. "Caboose?" he asked. "Would you please drop this?" he asked in the nicest voice he could manage. Caboose let his shoulders slump _just a little bit_  because if he slumped a lot then Church might think he hated it here at his new base and that would be bad, because he loved it.

But it was even worse when Church got mad because then he would start screaming and that wasn't good for his pretty voice. So Caboose said "Okay," put his helmet back on and went to see if the Reds wanted to yell at him. Maybe Donut would paint his fingernails again.

* * *

 

A few hours later, Caboose wandered back into Blue Base with his gloves in his mouth and his hands outstretched. He didn't want to ruin the perfect coat of cobalt blue nail polish Donut had done for him. It matched his armor perfectly. He smiled to himself as he admired the way his fingernails shimmered in the fluorescent lights. Shiny. Caboose walked back to his small bedroom and kicked off his heavy boots, carefully removed his armor and laid down on his bed sighing.

His datapad lit up with a small noise. It started playing a little tune and he recognized it quickly as the ringtone he had set for his sisters. Caboose jumped up from his bed, snatched his datapad off the bedside stand and raced through the base calling "Church! Church, come quick!" He heard quick footsteps down the hall and hit 'accept' on the call just as Church sprinted into the room and looked around frantically.

"Caboose? Are you okay? What's wrong? What happened?" Church asks in a frenzy. Caboose just smiled at him and waved him over. "Nothing's wrong. I'm okay. I just want you to meet my sisters! I said I would call them but then I forgot and then I remembered but then I forgot again and now they called me!" Caboose rambled. He finished a with a wide smile and Church just snorted.

"Fine. Not like I've got anything else to do," he mumbled. Caboose clapped his hands. "Yay! You're going to love them! They're so nice!" he shouted. Church leaned away from him. "Jesus Caboose, keep your voice down. I'm right fucking here," he said, gesturing to the foot of space between them. Caboose looked sheepish. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

His datapad made a happy noise and he snapped his head down to look at it. A screen popped up and seventeen smiling faced gazed at him from millions of miles away. Tears stung at Caboose's eyes as a crackling, unanimous "Hi, Caboose!" burst forth from the speakers and seventeen hands waved to him. Caboose waved back enthusiastically.

"Hi! I miss you!" he shouted. Church put a hand over his helmet where his ear would be. "I'm so sorry I forgot to call!" Caboose said. He remembered that people usually liked to get apologies if you did something wrong. One of Caboose's sisters shook her head. "No, it's okay Mikey. It doesn't matter as long as you do call us. We just want to know you're doing okay," she said.

Caboose nodded vigorously. "Oh, yeah. I'm great. I'm having so much fun! I'm on Blue Team and the Red Team likes to yell at us," he said as if it made perfect sense to everyone, regardless. He waited a beat before tugging on Church's arm and dragging him into frame. "I almost forgot! Church, this is Petra, Skylar, Adeline, Gwyneth, Miya, Hildie, Renee, Sylvia ,Cecilia, Elli, Iliana, Trinity, Jocelyn, Lydia, Yana, Victorya and Tara," Caboose said, pointing to each of the girls on the screen. "Say hi to Church!" They all waved to him. "Hi, Church!" came seventeen voices.

Church offered them an unenthusiastic wave. "None of you look alike. The fuck is up with that?" he asked. One of the sisters, Renee, perked up. "Most of us were adopted. Except Michael and Gwyneth, they've got pure Caboose blood running through their veins," she said proudly. Church nodded slowly. What kind of people adopted sixteen daughters?

"Ooh, Michael, how's the weather where you are? Is it... Actual weather?" Iliana asked. Caboose nodded. "Yep! Real weather. Blood Valley is very sunny and warm all the time and I always wear sunscreen when I go outside," he said. Church turned his visor towards him. "First off, it's Blood _Gulch_  and second you're wearing armor, you don't need sunscreen."

Caboose looked offended. "Well, Church, obviously if I don't put on sunscreen every time I go outside I'm going to forget when I'm NOT wearing my armor," he said matter-of-factly. Church gave him a deadpan stare, even though it was useless behind his helmet. Okay, Caboose had problems remembering things (except for all his sisters' names). He was just going to file that away for later.  
   
"I'm guessing you're his commanding officer?" Petra asked, although it sounded an awful lot like an interrogation. Church paused. "Uh... Yeah?" He still had to get used to it. Petra crossed her arms. "Is he eating well? Does he get enough sleep? Are you reminding him to take his pills and put on his patches in the morning?" She demanded. Church blanked.

"Um. Yes, he's eating fine and he sleeps well. Pills, yes. Every day, right?" Petra nodded. "I haven't heard anything about patches, though, what the fuck are those about?" Church asked, looking over at Caboose, who had become oddly silent. Tara waved her hands around. "Mikey can tell you if he wants, that's none of our business!" she shouted. 

Church stepped back and held up his hands. "Okay okay, Calm the fuck down. Caboose, it was nice meeting your sisters," he said. "I'll let you have some time alone." He turned on his heel and walked out of the room, his armored boots clunking on the concrete floor.

* * *

 

Blood Gulch at starset was pretty nice. Church liked sitting up on the roof of the base and just watching it. He was pretty sure he'd get sick and tired of it in a few weeks, though. Then he'd have to find something else to do. Maybe he could finally do some target practice with his sniper. He was sitting with his feet dangling off the edge and his hands idly strumming Grif's battered ukulele. During the first weeks of their deployment, he and Grif snuck off up the cliff and he learned how to play. Now he just stole it from Grif's room whenever he wanted to.

A song sprang into his head. One from a long time ago. Church cleared his throat a few times a began to sing, playing a few chords on the ukulele.

If you need  
A little something special  
Maybe I can  
Be that something special  
Do you need  
A little something special?  
Do you need me?

I'd love to be  
Your something special  
I'd love to make  
You feel oh so special  
I can be your  
Something special  
If you'd let me

If you need a little  
If you need a little  
Do you need a little  
Something special?  
If you want a little  
If you want a little  
I can be your little  
Something special

If you need  
A little something special  
Maybe I can  
Be that something special  
Do you need  
A little something special?  
Do you need me?

Church sighed heavily and stared out across the gulch. He kind of wished he knew a different song. The one he played sounded too... Intimate. And it was weird singing something like that when he didn't have anyone to be intimate _with_. And Tucker didn't count. That was one time and he had made sure that he was _never_  going to do that again. Ew.

"You have a pretty voice," Caboose said, walking up the ramp behind him and sitting down heavily next to him. He wasn't wearing his helmet. Again. One of these days that was going to get him killed. "Huh?" Church asked, fiddling with the ukulele strings. Caboose patted his legs with his hands. "I said you have a pretty voice. But I think it would sound better if you weren't wearing a helmet," he said. He started kicking his legs ack and forth. Church frowned. He was almost flattered, but then Caboose had to mention his helmet.

"I'm _not_  taking off my helmet, Caboose," Church said tiredly. Was he ever going to give it up?  Caboose hummed. "Yes you are," he said with a smile. His smile showed the gap between his two front teeth. Church leaned back and rested on his hands. He looked up at the sky. "No, I'm not," he assured Caboose. Caboose scooted closer to him. "You are. Because I want to see what you look like and my sisters do too," he said. Caboose was unbearable. 

Church groaned. He didn't want to deal with this. Why was it such a big deal to Caboose wether he took his helmet off or not? "... Not now," he reasoned. Maybe a compromise would make him feel better? Caboose nodded agreeably. "Next week, then. You can show my sisters next week when I call them again." a faint breeze ruffled Caboose's hair and he closed his eyes contentedly. Church plucked at the ukulele.

"Sure. Now will you leave me alone, Caboose?"

Caboose hopped up from the ledge "Okay," he said simply. Church stared at him. He hadn't expected that to work. Caboose started to walk away and Church strummed a few chords. He glanced over at Caboose. "... That's the only song I know how to play, by the way. I- I think I wrote it for my girlfriend a long time ago," Church called after him.

Caboose stopped in his tracks. He kicked at the ground with his boot. "It's nice," came the mumbled reply. Church shrugged. "Yeah... I guess so." The star set behind the red canyon walls and everything around them darkened. The lights on their armor clicked on silently, small slits of blue light in the shadowy air.

* * *

 

A week later Caboose was sitting at the table, his head resting on his hands, with a bowl of his favorite cereal and his datapad. His sisters, halfway across the galaxy, all wore similar expressions. They had been waiting ten minutes for Church to join them and they were getting impatient. "Okay, is he really going to come?" Skylar asked abrasively.

"Yes," Caboose said without hesitation. He poked at the soggy remains of his cereal. To be honest, he wasn't really sure if Church would come, but he promised. And best friends always kept their promises. "Are you sure, because he's not even here," Jocelyn pointed out. She was absently braiding Yana's hair into twin braids.

Caboose fiddled with his spoon. "I told him I was going to call you again and that he promised to show you what he looked like and he wouldn't just-" The kitchen door slammed against the wall forcefully and Church stood with his foot in the air. He had kicked the door in. It had a footprint on it now. Church tucked his helmet snugly under his arm and strode as casually as he could to the table.

"Helmet hair's a bitch. That's all I'm saying," he commented, brushing a stray lock of hair out of his eyes and leaning against the table. "Huh?" Caboose muttered quietly. He was still staring at Church, eyes widened in awe. Church looked away, an embarrassed blush creeping across his face. He cleared his throat once. "It took forever to get my hair to stick up again," he clarified, running his bare fingers through his hair.

Eighteen voices stayed silent.

Church gave them all a death glare. "What? Stop fucking looking at me like that! I wanted to make a dramatic entrance, all right?" he admitted. He really wished he could hide behind his helmet visor right now, this was unreasonably embarrassing. Caboose snapped out of his trance first. "You DO have black hair!" he exclaimed, almost knocking over his cereal in his excitement. Church's hand instinctively shot out to stabilize the bowl. "So what?" he mumbled.

Caboose started smiling. "I told you! I told you he had hair like you, Trinity!" he said happily, turning back to the datapad. Trinity was one of the older siblings and it showed. She knew exactly how to handle Caboose. "He does," she agreed. "And you were right about his nose too. Are you psychic? Ooh, or did you cheat? Did you already know what he looked like?" she asked.

"I- Wh- Pshhh." Caboose waved his hand around. "I did NOT. He never showed me," he said confidently. "Is this true?" Hildie asked, leaning closer to the screen. Church fidgeted. "Yeah... I just never fucking cared before," he said. "Before?" Elli teased with a well-placed eyebrow raise. Church shrugged, trying to be noncommittal. "He kept fucking pestering me about it, what was I supposed to do? His voice gets so annoying sometimes!" he said.

Victorya nudged Adeline with her elbow. "Pfft, only sometimes?" she joked. Caboose frowned slightly. He glanced over at Church, who was in the middle of screwing his face into a half-smirk half-grimace. "Y-yeah, only sometimes. Only when he's saying the same damn thing over and over and he won't fucking shut up!" Church said, sending Caboose a pointed look. Caboose stood up from the table in his frenzy. "Hey! If you just did it the first time, I wouldn't have to ask so many times!" he shouted, throwing his hands up.

Church, a good five inches shorter than Caboose, shrunk under his unintentionally intimidating move. His face got redder. "Can we stop talking about this now? I did it, okay? That's what matters," he said, taking a step back from Caboose. He hadn't noticed Church's uncomfort. "Yep. And you look pretty," he said with a nod. Church blanked. He squinted at Caboose as he sat back down. "I what?" he demanded.

Not one of Caboose's sisters dared speak. The silence dragged on and Caboose slowly grew more and more embarrassed of what he said. He kept staring into his cereal bowl with his mouth closed tightly. Church walked over and sat down at the table across from him, out of view of the datapad. "Caboose?" he prompted softly. Caboose exhaled through his nose. He opened his mouth once, inhaled, closed it again. "You look pretty. And your eyes look pretty too. I like your green eyes," he said as quickly as he could without tripping over his words.

Church couldn't help the small smile that crept across his face. He swiftly grabbed that datapad and ended Caboose's call, cutting off a few shouts of confusion from the other end. "What about my eyes?" Church asked again. He was full-on smiling now. He had to admit flattery could get someone anywhere with him.

Caboose pushed his hair behind his ears. "Ah, Church, I think you should pay more attention," he said. He had gotten past his embarrassment at least. "I said your eyes are pretty," Caboose said with conviction. Church covered his mouth to hide his smile. "That- you're the second person who has said that to me," he admitted. Caboose took his cereal bowl and drank the rest of the remaining milk. "Maybe people would say it more if you took off your helmet," he said matter-of-factly.

He was so invested in the 'no helmets' thing, Church wasn't even going to mention the enormous milk mustache he had.

* * *

 

Church started wearing his helmet less when they were inside the base. Caboose would wake up and come to the kitchen for breakfast. Church would be nursing a cup of coffee in all his pointy-nosed green-eyed glory. Then Church would toss Caboose his container of pills and mumble something like 'don't forget' and sometimes 'stop being an idiot because you definitely forgot yesterday and you can't do that because then all of your sisters will find me and gut me.'

Caboose appreciated the fact that Church was helping him remember to take his pills. He really did, because some days it was that hardest thing in the world to remember and having someone there made it better, especially if that someone was your cool best friend. But cool best friends weren't perfect like superheroes or astronauts (even though Church was pretty close) and they couldn't make _everything_  okay. Everyone had bad days. Caboose knew that.

Today was a bad day.

Caboose sat on the edge of his bed wearing favorite weekend socks, the ones with the tiny dogs on them. He liked the weekend. It meant no stupid math homework. But in Blue Base he didn't need to do math homework, and weekends should be fun. But he was feeling terrible. Not sick terrible, thank goodness, but just plain terrible. He put a hand to his forehead, checking for a fever like his sisters did. But it didn't work if he did it to himself. He took four deep breaths like they taught him and made sure his throat didn't hurt. He put a hand to his chest to feel his heartbeat and-

Caboose jerked his hand away like he had been burned. He frowned at his chest. It wasn't right. It wasn't right and he felt weird all the time. Why couldn't he have been born like he was supposed to? It was so much work. So many pills and patches and savings accounts and shopping trips and therapy and tears and dys- what was the word? Dys... Dystopia? Diaspora?

Dysphoria.

Caboose huffed a loud breath and flopped down on his bed. He stared at the ceiling and the stickers he'd put up there. The woodland animals usually made him feel a bit better. The tiny bears having a picnic with some squirrels never failed to bring a smile to his face. But now it just reminded him how out of place he was. The bear was so comfortable around the squirrels. They were all exactly who they were supposed to be.

Caboose could feel hot tears prickling at his eyes. He screwed his eyes shut and told himself 'No. No crying, not now. You're a grown-up, stop. Grown-ups only cry when they lose their job.' Caboose hadn't lost his job. He didn't have a reason to cry. He shouldn't. It would only make things worse, anyway. Not that things could get much worse. Then, Caboose heard a knock on his door. He only hoped it wasn't Tucker. Tucker would make things worse.

"Church?" Caboose asked. "Yeah. Come get some food. And take your pills," Church said, muffled by the door. Caboose frowned at the ceiling. He didn't want his pills... But, food. He was pretty hungry. Breakfast sounded good. Caboose sluggishly got up from his bed and stood carefully. He waited a few moments, made sure he could stand, and padded to the door. Caboose opened it a crack and peeked out. "I don't want to," he whispered. Church raised an eyebrow. "Don't want to eat or don't want to take your pills? What are they even for anyway?" he asked.

Caboose stayed silent. His eyes flicked over Church's face. "I don't want to take my pills. I don't feel happy today," he mumbled. Church paused. Caboose could see him slowly getting panicked. "Hey, can I come in?" he asked gently. Caboose picked at the edge of his shirt. He twirled a lock of hair between his fingers. "Okay," he said quietly. What was wrong with having a best friend with you? Church squeezed inside and shut the door behind him. He sent a glance around the room.

"What's wrong?" Church asked. He still hung by the door while Caboose paced listlessly around the small cube. He shrugged. "Lots of things," he mumbled. Church sighed. "Can you be more specific?" he asked. "So I can-" He looked up at Caboose. "So I can help you?" Caboose stopped pacing. He looked down at the floor, at the piles of clothes he forgot to fold or put in the laundry. "Don't be mad," Caboose whispered.

Church looked offended. "Why would I be mad? What the fuck could you possibly say to make me mad?" he demanded. Caboose kicked at a pile of clean clothes. He sat down and started to fold them. Something to do so he didn't have to look at Church. "I don't want to take my pills or wear my patches or have to remember all by myself to take my binder off at night but I have to..." he started. "Because if I don't, then I don't feel okay. And all I want is to feel okay."

Church slowly sat down next to Caboose and grabbed a sweater to fold. "So, all those things make you feel better?" he asked. Caboose nodded. "Yeah," he said. "But it's hard remembering and sometimes I have bad days like this one and I get dys- dysphoria really bad because I don't look like a boy even though I AM-" Church put his hand over Caboose's. "Wait wait wait. Back the fuck up," he said. Caboose tensed up. Oh no. He said too much. Maybe it was a bad idea. Church sounded angry. He hated when people got angry when he told them. What if Church didn't want to be his friend anymore?

"Are you trans?" Church asked. His voice didn't sound angry. He sounded like he cared. Caboose stopped thinking about the bad things. Church didn't hate him? Maybe? "Yeah," Caboose said meekly. Church snorted. "Oh my god, Caboose, Calm down. I'm not gonna hurt you," he said calmly. "It's okay. I don't give a shit," he admitted. Caboose let out a breath. That was better than hating him. He started to giggle. Everything was okay. It was okay. Church was still his best fried and he didn't even have to give his speech about why he was a boy and not a girl.

And then he started to cry.

And he let himself cry, even though he hadn't lost his job. He cried because he was happy. Church's eyes went wide. "Uh, Caboose? You okay?" he asked, putting a hand on his shoulder. Caboose nodded. "I'm okay. I'm happy," he said. Church cracked a lopsided smile. "Dude, people don't usually cry when they're happy," he explained. Caboose nodded. "I know. They do when they're so happy they forget how to smile," he said.

* * *

 

Caboose, not including his bad days, was a generally happy person. Especially since he now knew Church didn't hate him for being trans. It was hard for him to make friends usually, because they didn't like that. But that was him and if they didn't like it then they couldn't be his friend. So Caboose had one friend, not including his sisters. Church was his best friend. He reminded him every morning to take his pills and put on his patch and he never once asked what they were for. And every night he would remind Caboose to brush his teeth and take off his binder and he would sometimes pretend to forget because his binder made him feel better.

Church got a little bit mad at him when he pretended to forget.

"Caboose, what the fuck?" he shouted. He dragged his comb through his damp hair one last time before sending Caboose a heavy glare. "You _have_  to take off our binder at night!" he shouted. "Because it's bad for our back. And you have to carry all that armor around every day so if you have a bad back you can't wear your armor and if you can't wear your armor you can't protect yourself and if you can't do that!" he put the comb down on Caboose's dresser. "Then you'll die." Caboose looked sheepish. "So take it off or you'll die," Church insisted.

Caboose remembered to take his binder off after that. He didn't want to die. And he didn't want Church to get angry at him like that again. He knew that the mean way Church acted sometimes was just his weird version of showing he cared. Like when Blue Team had a movie night and Tucker wanted to watch 'Reservoir Dogs'. Again. Caboose wanted to watch the video his sisters sent him of his dog back home, 'Freckles', who just had puppies.

"What is going on?" Church screeched. His voice was really high. That meant he was mad for real... Probably at Tucker. Tucker was standing in front of the tv and not letting Caboose plug in his movie. Tucker was being mean. Church pinched the bridge of his nose. He was angry for real. "Tucker, we've watched that piece of crap about a thousand times. Even _I'd_  rather watch Caboose's dog video," he said. Caboose smiled. "Really? Oh my gosh, we can have our _own_  movie night! Just us, no Tucker! And we can watch Freckles and the puppies!" Caboose was bouncing up and down now.

Church shut his eyes for a second. "For the love of god," he muttered under his breath. "Fine," he said. "Fine. If it'll keep you two from being assholes to each other." Tucker raised his fist in victory. Caboose smiled even wider, which was probably impossible. With a resigned sigh, Church grabbed the good pillow off the couch and retreated back towards Caboose's room, muttering something like 'being a C.O. Is a load of crap.' Caboose followed him like a duckling. A very tall, surprisingly strong duckling.

Caboose liked to build pillow forts. But they only had two pillows and Caboose's super soft blanket so instead he propped the pillows against the side of his bed and sat down, wrapping himself in the blanket. Church sat down next to him, leaning a good few inches between them and effectively losing any and all body heat he could have gained from Caboose. He wouldn't let that stand. "Church," he whispered. "Pssst, Church?" Church tore his eyes away from the video of Freckles' puppies and looked over at Caboose.

"What," he hissed. Caboose opened up the blanket cocoon he was in. "Come get warm," he said simply. Church squinted at him. "What?" he asked. Caboose smiled at him. "Crawl on my lap. It's warm," he said. Church rolled his pretty green eyes. "I'm not getting in _your lap_ , Caboose," he said. "Why not? You look cold. And it is very warm in my lap. I have a blanket." Church frowned. "I don't want to get in your lap," he muttered.

Caboose shrugged. "Okay," he said and brought his arm around Church's shoulder, draping them doth with the big, warm blanket. Caboose leaned closer to Church. "Better?" he asked. Church went red. "Fine," was all he said. The video was shorter than either of them had hoped, but Church didn't get up to leave when it was over. He sat, curled up next to Caboose, watching the static. After a moment of silence he scooted closer to Caboose and rested his head on his shoulder. Caboose opened his mouth to speak. "Shut up," Church muttered. "'m tryin to sleep." His voice was muffled by the soft blanket.

Church fell asleep to the sound of Caboose's steady breathing.

* * *

 

Church woke up with his head in Caboose's lap and a blanket over him. He opened his eyes slowly and noticed Caboose was sleeping against the bed with his head leaning back at a bad angle. Church scoffed. Great. Now he was going to have to deal with Caboose having a sore neck. Church didn't move from where he was. It was kind of nice, pretty comfy... And warm. He wouldn't object to spending his whole day like this. Except that Caboose was snoring.

He was snoring really softly and it reminded him weirdly of a dog. It was, dare he think it, adorable. He couldn't sit like this, listening to Caboose's tiny snores. He was going to do something stupid like brush that irritating hair out of his irritating face or tuck the blanket under his chin. Church figured he should just get up and get some coffee inside him. He slowly raised himself up, threw the blanket off himself and was out the door before he could think twice.

When Caboose joined him in the kitchen he was yawning widely and rolling his neck back and forth. Church grumbled incoherently. "My neck hurts," Caboose said tiredly as he slumped down at the table. His hair was somehow even more of a mess than when Church had seen him last. He had a horrible urge to attack it with a brush. God, when did he get soft? And for Cab _oose_?

It was probably when he had started crying and said he forgot how to smile.

Caboose scratched his head and leaned forward until his forehead hit the table with a 'thump'. "What's for breakfast?" he said. Church shrugged. "Whatever the fuck you want to make. I think there's a few eggs left for French toast if Tucker didn't eat them all. Remind me to call Command later and order more," Church said while Caboose got up from the table to rummage through the fridge.

"Aaahhh!" Caboose wailed. "Tucker!" he shouted. Tucker popped his head in the kitchen. "What?" he demanded irritably. Caboose pointed to the fridge. "You ate all the eggs. What am I supposed to have for breakfast now?" he asked. Tucker shrugged. "I don't know. Make something else? I mean, if you weren't busy fucking around with Church then you could've gotten them before I did," he said.

Caboose looked like he wanted to throw something. Probably Tucker. Church downed the rest of his coffee and turned around in his chair to look at Caboose. "What is up with you two? Why do you hate each other so much?" he asked. Caboose, resigned to his fate, poured himself a bowl of cereal. Church made him drink a glass of grapefruit juice too. "I don't like him because he is stupid," Caboose said, taking a sip of his juice. He wrinkled his nose at it. It was too bitter.

Church raised an eyebrow. "Really? I doubt that's the case. Yeah, he can be stupid sometimes but that's not why you don't like him," Church said. Caboose sighed. "Okay. Fine. I don't like him because he talks about things that I do not like and he makes jokes about us and it is not nice because-" Church held up his hand. "Wait, he talks about things you don't like?" he asked. Caboose nodded. "Yes. Like his 'hey chicka bump bump' jokes. And he thinks that you and I are boyfriends," Caboose said quietly.

Church choked on air. "Heh. Oh-okay. That's ridiculous," he said. "Right?" Caboose shrugged. "I mean. You are really cool and everything but I don't like you like a boyfriend," he said. Church let out a breath. He nodded slowly. "Okay. Good. Great. That would have really fucked our relationship, might I add," he said. A silence stretched between them. Church pushed his empty coffee cup away from him. "You said you don't his sex jokes?" Church asked. "Tucker's, I mean."

Caboose nodded. "Yeah. They make me uncomfortable," he said. Church frowned. "Why?" he asked. Caboose shrugged. "I just don't like them. I don't... I don't like it," he said. "You don't like sex?" Caboose flicked his eyes over the table. He watched Church run his finger over the rim of his mug. He watched his cereal get soggy. "No, I don't like it." Church tipped his mug to the side. "Alright. That's fine. I mean, I don't think Tucker's gonna stop, though." Church smirked. "I think it's how he copes."

* * *

 

"Caboose?" Church called into the base. No answer. "Caboose!" he shouted louder. He could hear some shuffling from down the hall. "Caboose, what the fuck are you doing?" he asked, walking closer to the sound. Caboose was sitting against his door looking guilty. Church raised an eyebrow. "I locked myself out of my room," he said. Church snorted. "Wow, are you serious? How'd you manage that?" he wondered. Caboose's gaze shifted to the left. Church narrowed his eyes. He was lying. "Caboose. Why did you lock yourself out of your room?" he asked again. Caboose opened his mouth. "Well," he started. It was the longest Church had ever heard him draw it out.

"Sheila told me when your birthday was so I wanted to make you something special but then I heard you and I closed my door so you wouldn't see the surprise and now it's locked and I can't get in," Caboose said, not even stopping for a breath. Church slowly closed his eyes and put a hand over his face. "What am I going to do with you?" he muttered to himself. "Caboose, is your window open?" he asked. Caboose shook his head morosely.

"How the fuck did I get here?" he wondered aloud. "How did I end up here, stuck in the position of commanding officer dealing with a soldier's locked door?" Church walked up to the door and shoved his shoulder against it roughly. It didn't budge. He waved Caboose over. "Come help me with this," he said. Caboose leaned against the door, mimicking Church and they both slammed their shoulders against the door. Church grunted. "Almost," he said, more of an empty reassurance than anything else.

After ten minutes of trying and ten more convincing Lopez to help them, they broke the door in. Caboose allowed himself a split second of celebration before pushing Church back into the hall and yelling about ruining the surprise. Church waited impatiently while Caboose puttered around in his room, presumably finishing Church's present. He emerged from his room not long after, holding something behind his back. Caboose was smiling proudly. "Happy birthday, Church!" he said sweetly and placed a sheet of paper in Church's hands.

It was simple, mostly drawn with charcoal and a little bit of blue crayon but it was the most detailed portrait Church had ever seen. It was him, sitting on the roof of the base at sunset, the ghost of a smile on his face. Church stood staring at it, petrified, for a long time. "You-" he looked up at Caboose. "You drew this?" he asked. "For me." Caboose nodded. "I knew you would love it! It was so much fun to make!" he said. Church laughed, breathy and quiet. "I love it, Caboose," he said.

* * *

 

"Hey Caboose?"

The base was quiet. Tucker had fucked off to who-knew-where and Church and Caboose were in the kitchen making dinner. It was hard working with leftovers, especially since Command had stopped sending them real food and all they were getting now were the shitty MREs that tasted like chalk and pennies. The only real food they had left was a jar of grapefruit marmalade that Church made Caboose eat on his toast and a box of spaghetti plus some half-dozen odd spices.

Caboose had taken over trying to get the marmalade to taste like spaghetti sauce and Church was sitting on the counter next to him swinging his legs lazily. "What are your pills for?" He had never really asked about it. Never really cared to look at the prescription, just grabbed the bottle and chucked it across the room at Caboose. But he'd be lying if he said he wasn't curious. Caboose popped open the cap of an old container of garlic powder and dumped half of it into the bowl of 'spaghetti sauce.'

"It's to help me focus," Caboose said easily. Like he had rehearsed it. "Because sometimes I forget things and I can't sit still and that isn't fun for me. I like to sit still and remember things and focus, so I take those every morning and it makes it easier." Caboose put down the garlic powder and stirred the marmalade absently. Church leaned his head back and looked up at the ceiling. "Oh. Okay," he said, mostly at a loss for the right words. "And... If you don't mind, why do you take patches? Aren't those really expensive?" he asked. Church looked down from the ceiling at his feet, slowly kicking back and forth.

Caboose scratched his nose, leaving a pale dusting of garlic powder on it. "I hate needles," he said, dead serious. "I hate getting shots and I don't want to do that every day so my sisters helped me make a savings account when I was twelve and I saved up money so I could buy things I needed." Church cleared his throat. "Wow. Your sisters sound nice. Maybe I shouldn't have hung up on them. They might actually be coming for me. To kill me," he joked. "But thanks for telling me. And for the record," Church said, "I don't like needles either."

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Tumblr @voiid-vagabond and Instagram @voiid.vagabond
> 
> Don't forget to leave a comment! ❤❤❤
> 
> I did so much goddamn research for this and I hope it payed off! I'm still trying to get better at writing people who identify differently than I do. It's difficult, sure. I'm used to writing about things I can relate to because I have a nearly endless reservoir of knowledge.
> 
> Please tell me if there's any way I can get better at writing trans characters, I want to be good...


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